It was this premise that took me around Adoration rooms across the island, seeking ideal places to encounter Him.
Deep inside, I think I suspected it was not all about Jesus; it was about me, secretly desiring a spiritual experience. Maybe just for me, God may allow a little miracle to strengthen my faith. After all, I am His beloved child, right?
When nothing of the sort happened, I wavered and I started to doubt these visits.
“Maybe He is not home?” “Maybe I talk too much in my mental conversations and Jesus cannot squeeze in His divine inspirations” … Many maybes.
For reasons unclear even to myself, I kept to these visits and through a series of seemingly unrelated conversations, finally recognised God’s hand personally leading and forming me.
How hard did I really have to look? I like to think I tried and did my share of work; the rest fell together all because He was there.
Here are my top 5 insights:
1. *Every visit is an exercise of faith*
God is real and present, yet this awareness can go against every fibre of the intellect. Every time I enter to Adore, I surrender a little more to let go and with that simple act of my will, I let God enter and reign in my life.
Someone gave me the gift of this term. Like sun-tanning, we get Son-kissed bit by bit. Positive changes to our faith lives subtly happen even if we feel like we are doing nothing. I found a resolve beyond the human will to overcome sinful ways. And it is no doubt, due to God’s grace.
3. *Checking in*
As with any conversation and relationship we hope to build, it is best in person. God loves each of us as if there were only one of us (cf St. Augustine). He is interested in our lives no matter how mundane or dramatic. Just take it to Him. Check in with Him even if it feels awkward initially because you know, it really isn’t. That self-imposed barrier disappears after a while.
4. *Talking aloud*
I like this when there is an opportunity when no one else is around. It is an intimacy I resonate with. Give this exercise a try and immerse in the reality of your encounter.
5. *Sometimes the mind imagines*
My monkey mind is my hardest challenge. I figured I need to focus in these conversations as God certainly would have something important to say. I beat myself up for not being disciplined till someone shared this with me: God owns our imagination too. He can delight and use our imagination to connect with us. That blew me away.
I am still growing and learning from Jesus by being in His company. Sometimes I just be. I have stopped “hunting” ideal Adoration rooms. Now I know as long as Jesus is there, something good is bound to happen. Truly, it has.
At Landings, we do the necessary groundwork to make sure it is our Lord who guides us in our mission. You can share in this mission to reconnect an away Catholic back to Church simply by following us our Facebook Page: Landings – Singapore, on Instagram: @landings.sg or emailing us at firstname.lastname@example.org
It’s a small effort to make to bring a soul back to God!